There are times i sit here and ask myself why things happen the way they do. God has a plan. That plan may be to help you grow or make you a better person. You will never know until you are able to look beyond the small things and see the bigger picture. One of my closest friends had to step back for awhile to help me see the light. Ive depended on this person like there was nobody else. Although she was there for me if i needed her I didnt want to bother her. She has helped me open my eyes and see things that were right in front of my face. Some call it tough love, I call it a true friend. Eventhough she never told me what her intentions were I figured it out the hard way. this person has told me her advice the last year and I never really listened until she wasnt physically here. I guess with friends like that and God, you can accomplish ANYTHING! My life is blessed with some amazing people. I may get hurt and feel like im gonna fall apart but in the end God has a plan for me. I have an amazing family. I may not have alot of money to buy gifts or do things for my friends but I will do alot for the people I care about. God has brought people in my life when i least expect it. He provides for us when we arent expecting it. I guess i have to say Ive learned alot of life lessons the last few years. As long as you have God to look upon, nothing else matters. Thank you to those who have made a difference in my life.
So I woke up this morning to here my kids talking. Miss Drama Queen just got out of the shower and i just layed there listening.
Drama Queen: SHHHHH Bandit stay quiet, mom is sleeping!"
so i hear them walk down the stairs with the baby and i layed there listening to them. I sneak downstairs and watch them. They put Little B in the highchair and moved him into the living room in front of the tv to watch cartoons. They gave him kix and a nutrigrain bar and a sippy cup of milk. They all sat there eating their breakfast in front of the tv. I came down and asked what they were doing.
Drama Queen: "we wanted to let you sleep so we were takin care of the baby"
I just thought that was the sweetest thing ever. I have such great and thoughtful children.
So my parents and grandma have been here visiting me for the last two weeks. Today was a rough day. Miss Drama Queen refused to acknowledge the fact that they were leaving. She asked if she could go with grandma and of course i said no. we get to the airport and i open the trunk of the car and her suitcase comes flying out. she grabs the bag and says "Bye mom love you, im going with grandma.' i explained to her she cant go with them so she grabs on to my mom and screams as loud as she could. she cried so loud everyone around us kept watching. we had to pry her off my parents and throw her in the car and lock the door.i felt so bad for her, she cried so hard. Life is so hard at times. I just dont know how to take some days as a parent. I guess through god and friends. Its the only way to help
My life has been a journey. There are times that I was distinctively following Jesus Christ. There are times I fell off the wagon and made poor choices. Having children and experiencing life trials opened my eyes. I may not be rich or have the things that i desire. I can say I have a family who loves me and cherishes me. I think my whole life I have held my hand out to anyone and everyone passing me. I have helped out anyone needing help. Even if that person somehow has betrayed me or let me down, I held my hand out to them. At one point in time i was called the 'Go To Girl,' since i was always helping people out. Why do I do this? Wouldnt God do it? My trust in people has pretty much gone away. Im tired of being taken advantage of or not mattering when I need a hand held out to me. Life isnt always easy. Even with god in your life, it can be hard. You have to sit back and chose paths you want your family to follow. Even if its not a path you want to take. I guess I have opened my eyes and im not sitting in the back row of the bleachers anymore. Im standing on the stage and voicing my opinion. Im tired of being shot at and turned away. My life has meaning. My kids may not always be on their best behavior but as a mother it is my job to redirect them. They learn bad choices from other people. Its my duty as a mother to redirect their behavior. I can lock my kids in the house with no video games, tv and radio and they will never learn bad things (unless they come from me). Thats not likely going to happen. I guess what Im saying is God gives us choices everyday. We choose which ones to follow. Its our choice to lock our kids up or to not hold our hand out when someone passes by. I feel that Im a pretty good person and i will be there for pretty much anyone as long as they havent screwed me over in some way or another. I have many great friends and I thank God for that. Most people have one maybe two great friends. I can say I have quite a few. I may have lost alot of friends through my journey but i think god makes us go through hearache to become stronger. My friends have helped me to become stronger. I feel that God cant be here on earth so he gave us friends to help him. I may not always know the right things to say or do. I may not always think people are really listening to me or thinking of me. But I do know that I have at least one person in my life that does listen and know how im feeling and thats God. I dont know why ive focused on God so much lately but I have turned to him the last month. Ive gone through alot the last month and I turned to God for help. He has been here for me and always will be. I know not everyone will be able to drop what they are doing to help me physically or mentally but I know I have friends who will.
Ok so right now Im going through this huge tough battle....
A toddler in a big boy bed!
yep we are trying to get Little B into a bed. I started with a nap and it worked great. One hour and he was OUT! It took alot of putting him back into bed and alot of moral support from a great friend!
Yes he fell asleep with his head hanging off the side of the bed!
That night we tried to get him into bed again and yeah right....Daddy's home! He would climb into Bandits bed (Bandits already asleep) and smack him in the face and make noises while laughing. Then Little B kept running to the door, "DADDA, DADDA!" Well Dadda had work the next night so after an hour and 15 minutes yes i gave up and put him in the playpen. He cried...he did not want to go in the play pen!
Day one---It was a TIE!!!! No big boy bed at night!
Next night i put him in his bed. I sat outside the door and i see these little fingers carefully peeking through the door and he slowly opens the door and BOOM he tries to slam the door when he sees me lookin at him. I over powered him and opened the door and he took off running. He stops in the middle of the room and says, "MOMMA, MOMMA!" with a great big smile on his face, as he walks backwards to his bed. Yes he was sooo adorable but this momma was not a happy momma. He continued for over an hour of getting in and out of bed. He would watch to make sure i wasnt watching him and then he would make a run for it. After an hour of him sneaking in and out i decided to let him win again and he got the playpen! He does not want the playpen no more. He likes to be a big boy! Hopefully tomorrow will be more successful since theres no school the next day and i can spend all night if i have too.
Ok so Bandit comes up to me today and tells me about his day.
Mom: How was your day?
Bandit: Mom, Jay bit me today and called me stupid."
Mom: He what!? Did you tell the teacher?
Bandit: Yeah he just told me to ignore Jay.
WHAT???? A kid bites my kid and then the teacher tells him to just ignore him? Well tomorrow the school gets to find out what a mad mommy looks like. And I dont want the school calling me if this Jay kid gets the Crap beat out of him. Yes I gave my son permission to defend himself if this kid puts a hand on him! This by the way is not the first time we have ran into problems with him. If the teacher wont handle it then i guess Mommies have to do the dirty work!
Ok so a little about me. I was born and raised in good ol' Washington State. Yes I know some of your views on Washington but thats home to me. Im married to the love of my life. He serves in the United States Navy. Ive followed him to Italy. We lived in Italy for a year and a half. I met some great people there. I am currently residing in Oahu Hawaii. So far I love it here. I have met some good friends here. My friend (who is more like family) also moved here from Washington too. Its nice to have family so close. I have three kids. My husband would like to have more (we will see). Miss Drama Queen is 7. Bandit is 5 and Little B is one. I have my hands full but wouldnt trade it for anything.